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Morning!
This weekend we withdrew from all other duties and attended our first marriage conference.
Sometimes marriage can take a backseat to other responsibilities (kids, job, school, etc).
Life gets busy. Schedules get hectic. And the relationship begins to become stagnant.
Our marriage was not in trouble but we did desire to grow. To be better.
It was our first time, so we didn't know what to expect. Would the experience feel awkward? Depressing?
Turned out to be a fun environment with some humor. Even as serious topics were addressed.
The conference allowed my wife and I to focus on understanding each other and reminded us of God's purpose for our marriage. We left the conference feeling closer together and more equipped to continue growing. Below are my four marriage conference takeaways and three ideas to invest in your marriage.
4 takeaways from the conference:
- You may need a marriage "get away" to go deeper - During the conference, my wife and I discussed some topics that we were unable to discuss during our normal schedules. Some conversations require time, undivided attention and a safe space to adequately address. Is there a place that you have identified that is free from kids and other distractions?
- When marriage dreams are shattered, choose to build a better dream together - Have your perfect marriage dreams been shattered? From unmet needs, to changes in your spouse, and even unexpected tragedy, marriage may look different than you expected. This is hard to accept. But only a few options are available. You can choose to hold on to resentment from these shattered dreams. You can choose another spouse. Or you can let go of past expectations and choose to build a better dream with the person your spouse is today. Let us choose the last choice.
- God has a plan for your marriage - And the plan is not to remain miserable or feel stuck. He wants your marriage to thrive. Your marriage can serve as a great example and inspiration for others. However, a great marriage will not come automatically. It will take work, intentionality, and a plan to invest in your relationship.
- It is never too early or late to invest in your marriage - There was a couple attending the conference who had been married for 55 years. Another couple had been married only 5 days. This shows that we never stop growing in our marriage and it is never too early to invest in your relationship. Do not try to change everything at once. Pick one way to invest and stay consistent.
3 ways to invest in your marriage:
- Daily - Take 20 minutes to have a coffee or meal together. Have deeper conversations. Give each other your undivided attention.
- Monthly - Schedule an outing or date night together. Reflect. Relax. Learn something new about each other!
- Yearly - Plan a weekend or extended vacation to be alone with your spouse. Leave all other responsibilities behind!
Men, let's take the initiative to invest in our marriages!
P.S. My shirt says, Marriage is hard, worth it!
-Andre
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